Heart,
One day, you won’t be able to be broken.
One day I won’t be so broken and no one will be able to just reach inside of me and smear their dirty fingers all over you.
One day you will be safe and strong and wild and free and no one will be able to stop you.
One day.
But for today, I apologize for the brokenness and the intrusions of the filthy fingers and the weakness that eats away at you. I am sorry that I don’t know how to treat you or listen to you, and I am too stupid to keep people from abusing you and using you against me. I am sorry that in 28 years, you have only had one person really know you and love you and she is gone now with the angels and can’t hear you anymore. I am truly sorry that no one knows or appreciates your beauty but me.
Yes…I am so, so sorry for that.
So please, stay alive, because I do care and I am trying to do right by you, but old habits are just so hard to break, and our ideas of love are just two totally different things but similar all the same.
We just want someone to love us forever…and I am doing everything in my power to work on that.
Keep on loving,
Me